I don't feel like making lemonade today. In fact, I don't feel like doing much. I just got out of bed, just shy of noon. I feel defeated, sad, depressed. In the past year, I've really had only ONE chance of achieving pregnancy. ONE. In twelve months. I don't count my two cycles in January and February 2011 because my tube was blocked. My cycle in June after my tubal cannulation surgery is the only real shot I had. I'm frustrated. I try to be positive about all of this all the time. But reality is, I can't be. I hate feeling this way.
How can I reframe my thoughts to get back into a better place? How do people live through infertility? I did an internet search, for inspirational infertility quotes. And I came across this post on "999 Reasons to Laugh at Infertility". I may have to spend some more time on this site...
I just spent a half hour looking at that website and laughing! Hang in there!
ReplyDeletePrepare yourself-I dont want you to vomit-but I swear on my life-on January 12, 2010 I had to terminate my first pregnancy because my daughter at 16 weeks in utero had a fatal neural tube defect-she literally had nothing from the neck up but a cyst.
ReplyDeleteAfter reading my chart the anesthesiologist for my procedure asked me to tell him why I was here today-so I said "my baby has no brain and not one but two doctors told me I should terminate this pregnancy"-he then looked at me and said "You're young, when life gives you lemons, you can always make lemonade."
Without missing a beat I responded "I would prefer to chuck them at assholes who say ignorant things."
I believe we are cut from the same cloth :)